romanticizing mental illness is dangerous and misleading

mythininspirations:

daddyslittleprincess118:

Artsy depression: haunted eyes, good at art, emo hair and eyeliner on point

Actual Depression: bloodshot eyes, no longer trust themselves with pencils, has not showered in five days

Quirky OCD: organized books, clean room, color coordinated outfits

Actual OCD: Intrusive thoughts, flipping the light switch 8 times so you don’t stab your brother, picking holes in your skin

Cute eating disorders: Slim trim and beautiful, shyly refusing a second helping, dancer aesthetic

Actual eating disorders: Puffy cheeks and eroded teeth from excessive vomiting, hair growing over your freezing body and refusing to eat carrots because they’re too high in carbs

Adorable anxiety: just a smol bean, soft, must be protected from the world

Actual anxiety: crying so hard you throw up, shaking, losing sleep over a period after the “okay”

RPG PTSD: flashbacks, vietnam, u don’t know what i’ve been through kiddo

Actual PTSD: Buying your first pregnancy test at twelve, flinching at high fives, i can’t feel my hands where am I what year is it

Cartoon ADHD: look a squirrel, something shiny, fidgety loveable bufoon

Actual ADHD: rereading the same page over and over because it doesn’t make sense, hasn’t done the laundry in four months, hyperfocusing on a mushroom knowing you have work to do

stop making terrifying realities seem cute. it’s disrespectful for those of us who are actually struggling

Yeah, this, this and more of this,

I also want to note that these stereotypes of mental illnesses are extremely damaging, as they make people who are honest to god suffering, not seek out help because it “doesn’t sound like depression/ptsd/ocd should sound”

farmworld:

i wish ppl on here werent so anti-recovery. ur therapist teaching u coping methods isnt ‘neurotypical bs’. listen to ur therapist. take a break from social media if u have to. stay out of drama if it stresses u out. block ppl who hurt you or even ppl who piss you off.take time to chill but also make sure u do whatever work u can. talk to friends if ur able. find smbdy you can trust. but still treat them kindly and give them space if they need it.

like yea sometimes ur stuck with a mental illness, but tha doesnt mean you cant work towards even a small bit of recovery in a healthy way

americanpsycho1991:

i’m now seeing posts that are basically accusing therapists of being the same as ““““neurotypicals”””” who tell you that doing yoga will cure your depression

and it’s fucking killing me because ??? the idea of being annoyed by people telling you that stuff is because those people honestly think that doing yoga and “looking on the bright side” will magically cure your depression, because they can’t imagine happiness not coming as easily to someone else as it does to them. the idea isn’t that getting exercise and practicing positive thinking are useless ways to treat depression. but that’s what i’m seeing a lot of now and i just want to say…. i got some fucking bad news, cause that is the treatment for depression.

therapists telling you to get good nutrition and exercise are not the same as your yoga-instructor aunt on facebook posting pictures of the sunrise and wondering how anyone can be depressed when the world is so wonderful!!! thats not just an anti-recovery attitude, it’s an anti-treatment attitude, and it’s unbelievably ignorant.

there’s sort of this interesting circular form to dealing with mental illness, where you start in a place of “i just need to think positively and push myself out of this ditch” and then you move to step 2, which is “depression is a real and very serious illness and it’s not my fault that i’m tired all the time, stop telling me to just “think positive” all the time.”

But then there’s step three, which is where you size up your situation and say “look, i understand how serious my illness is, and i’m no longer blaming myself for it. And it sucks, and I don’t “deserve” this, and I didn’t bring it on myself. But regardless of how unfair it is, the truth is that I’m the only one who can actually do anything about it.” And so in a lot of ways, you end up with parallel ways of thinking as before, but this time you’re coming from a completely different source of understanding. People who don’t know anything about mental illness say “depression is a choice.” People who are fed up with being depressed and realize that wallowing in the comforting embrace of self-pity is useful to erase guilt, but ultimately won’t help them lead a better life say, “recovery is a choice.”

The first group means that if you’re depressed, you can just magically decide not to be depressed. The second group means that depression is a crushing weight on your back determined to make your life as miserable (and as short) as possible, and that you didn’t do anything to cause it, but that ultimately you have the choice of giving up and accepting being depressed for the rest of your life, or you have the option of making an effort to improve your quality of life. Similar statements, totally different meanings.

But I think a lot of people are sort of seduced by the comfort of giving up, and with the good intention of creating communities of understanding and non-judgement between mentally ill people, social media has unwittingly created communities of mentally ill people encouraging each other to give up. To just accept that this is the way their lives are, and there’s no possibility of getting better. And that’s how it’s gotten to the point of people dismissing actual mental health professionals as being no different than some ignorant person who doesn’t know the first thing about psychology and thinks an avocado smoothie will solve all your problems.

Avocado smoothie people are coming from the first perspective, that being depressed is a free choice that you can easily opt out of. Therapists are coming from the second perspective, where mental illness is a horrible reality, but given that you’re seeing them, a provider of mental health treatment, of fucking course they’re going to give you advice on how to treat your mental illness! Your therapist isn’t going to sit around and say “yeah man that sucks, haha look at this funny meme about how much you want to kill yourself.” Your therapist is going to give you recommendations of activities and habits that will help you recover. And they understand that these activities are not easy!!! They get that!!! The reason they’re there is to help you introduce these activities and ways of thinking into your life!!! Otherwise they’d just hand you a pamphlet and walk out!!!

But you can’t access that kind of help – the kind where you say “getting out of the house is a real problem for me, I never have the energy to get out of bed” and your therapist says “okay let’s figure out how to break this down into small steps, we’ll set a small goal for this week, and next time we meet you can tell me if it worked out, and if it did then we can figure out what the next goal will be, and if not then we can figure out why it didn’t work and try a different approach” – if you immediately dismiss any mention of recovery as “neurotypical bullshit.”

Anyways please please please take your healthcare seriously, get treatment, and realize that giving up and normalizing your depression/anxiety/etc as something that will never ever get better (yes, even if it’s a chronic condition that you’ll never fully cure, you still need to treat it) is not okay. Try to get good nutrition. Try to get sunshine and exercise. Try to be social. Making an effort to do things that will help you is not the same as thinking mental illness is a switch you can easily flip. Getting treatment is not the same thing as pretending your mental illness doesn’t exist or isn’t serious. On the contrary, getting treatment is taking your mental illness seriously. I’m not saying you should never make a joke or reblog a fucking meme or anything, I’m saying don’t use social media as your mental health care provider. Social media can be a way to vent, but venting is not the same thing as recovering.

Honestly it can take a very long time to get to that “step 3″ perspective but it’s a vital step.

lizardlicks:

chelseigh:

hashtagdion:

surpriseversussuspense:

hashtagdion:

Even if you’re unemployed, even if you’re taking time off from school, even if nobody is calling and making plans with you, get out of bed, take a shower, put on clean clothes, wear some cologne or perfume, turn all the lights on, do some laundry, clean up a little bit.

Doing all this stuff causes a shift in your perspective. Do it in spite of your situation.

That’s the only way to create sustainable happiness, because if your behavior is dictated by your circumstances, you’re always going to be miserable.

Don’t let the world determine your mindset. Let your mindset determine how you view the world.

This is the most neurotypical shit I’ve ever read

Diagnosed bipolar and major depressive to the point I had to be hospitalized for it but fuck me for tryna keep it positive nahmean cool copypasta tho hate yall

mentally ill person: *trying to cope and recover in practical, pragmatic ways*
someone, inevitably: what kind of neurotypical bullshit is this

a lot of this website has fallen into the trap of equating being pro people who struggle with mental illness with being anti recovery, and even goes so far as to glorify and enable maladaptive symptoms and behaviors. This is a monumentally stupid idea. Illnesses and disorders are called that for a reason. They are not Cake and Happy Funtimes. They make you miserable, they make the people around you miserable, and everything sucks.

Posts that say “Keep trying to do this thing, even when you struggle with it,” are saying that for a reason. It’s fighting back against the illness, refusing to let it claim you. Yeah, it’s hard! Yeah, it sucks! Yeah, it’s okay for you to take a break if you need to! Yeah, it’s perfectly fine if you can’t do it alone and need to ask for help! Sometimes lots of help! But keep fighting. Keep resisting. It’s your life at stake.

Dear every person who lists all their mental illnesses in their “about me”

sjwsmustbedestroyed:

Also directed towards self-dxers, 14 year old “psychos”, and Tumblr.

I can most certainly tell you that the only illness you have is Attention Seeking Syndrome (ASS). You’re not sick. You were never sick. If you have 20+ mental illnesses listed in your about me, you’re ableist for fetishizing mental illness and wearing them as labels.

First, WebMD is not a doctor. Any “mental illness” quizzes you took online are not professionally constructed.

Let me debunk your self diagnosed mental illnesses by providing information that several of the things you list can not be diagnosed together, as they act as one illness, not two. Bipolar disorder and schizophrenia aren’t diagnosed together, as a lot of people seem to do. Instead, a patient would be diagnosed with Schizoaffective Disorder. [x][x][x] Furthermore, while bipolar (I or II) is easier to diagnose, schizophrenia would take more than just a simple quiz to diagnose. Multiple tests are conducted to determine if you have schizophrenia, and a lot of aspects are considered. It’s a difficult disease to diagnose, because it’s highly likely that it could be something else (especially if you’re still a very young teen or preteen). Furthermore, it’s highly uncommon to show schizophrenic behaviors in your early years of life (though, not impossible). Symptoms usually begin at age 16-30. [x][x][x] If you’re diagnosed with schizophrenia at the age of 12 or 13, you’re either going through prodome (which occurs when symptoms start very early, and when an adolescent starts realizing these behaviors aren’t normal), you were one of the rare cases that was diagnosed as a child, or you’re a liar. Taking these factors in mind, most younger teens and children wouldn’t be diagnosed with Schizoaffective Disorder, anyways, unless proven otherwise. For the people who actually do fall into the age category, I highly recommend asking for a doctor’s opinion because, as I previously stated, it’s a hard thing to diagnose. If it’s difficult for trained professionals to diagnose you, what makes you think you can do it?

Another example is PTSD coexisting with Acute Stress Disorder and/or Adjustment Disorder. Because they both have similar symptoms (anxiety, dissociative symptoms, etc.) but aren’t the same, only one diagnosis is needed. You don’t get to have all three, because your condition can be explained using only one of the diagnosis’s. Which brings me to another idea – if you suffer from “trigger warnings” and claim to have PTSD because of an event, that doesn’t make it PTSD. It could be either of the other two. You won’t know unless you get diagnosed properly.

Another example? Depressive disorder and Bipolar (I or II) disorder. Because Bipolar Disorder includes symptoms such as mania and depression, you’d only need to be diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, not Depressive Disorder. This is because your depression itself isn’t a disorder, it’s a side effect of a disorder you already have. You wouldn’t need two separate diagnosis’s since depression’s already covered in Bipolar.

You Are Not Special

What you’re doing is harming actual mentally ill people, because you’re actually romanticizing mental illness and using it to get special snowflake points rather than actually spreading awareness of the issue. Yeah, you heard me. It’s one thing if someone asks and you explain your experiences. It’s another thing to slap your “mental illness” on every single wall and shove it in someone’s face just to get sympathy or excuse you from your crappy behavior. You’re literally putting it on display for people to see, like some kind of trophy for the “most sick”. No one ASKED if you have Depressive Disorder/Schizophrenia/Narcissistic Personality Disorder/PTSD/ASS. If you have 20+ mental illnesses listed down your side bar, that’s telling us that you just want attention for the things you don’t have. That’s telling us that you’re so insecure for not being pitiful enough, that you had to diagnose yourself with something like “Narcissistic Personality Disorder” when in reality it’s not the disorder, it’s you. You realized you’re a self centered butt and now you’re using it as a crutch to excuse your disgusting attitude towards people. Also, it’s not a freakin’ contest. You shouldn’t be competing with Tumblr for the most mental illnesses listed.

A person shouldn’t be diagnosed with that many illnesses. If you’re hoarding every single mental illness because “oh dat’s so meh!!11!” or “i can rELATE CUZ i HAVE 3 OF DEEZ SYMPTUMS,,,” then you need to get off the internet and come back when you mature enough to respect the people who actually suffer from these life altering sicknesses. You’re hurting people.

YOU’RE HURTING PEOPLE AND YOURSELF

Because so many people are self diagnosing themselves or falsely tagging themselves with something they know they don’t have, less and less people are taking mental illness seriously. People are afraid to get help because they either don’t want to be grouped in with the likes of you, or they’re afraid that someone will just say “just pretending,,,” like you guys are making it out to be now. Plus, you’re acting on a hunch and following stereotypical behavior that’s hurting them. Believe it or not, you’re making Narcissistic Personality Disorder to be something completely heartless and rude. So many people who are self diagnosing themselves with this are just trying to excuse their rude behaviors, which in turn actually gives people with actual NPD a bad name. Mental illness is not cool. It was never cool.

Furthermore, you’re also hurting yourself. Let’s say you do have something wrong with you, and you self diagnosed yourself. You’re not. A. Professional. You could have symptoms of something else entirely, and now you just put yourself at a disadvantage because now you can’t get the resources you need to help your illness. It could be something dangerous. Your mental illness could be the result of a dangerous brain tumor or cranial cavity that’s altering your personality. Or, it could be another mental illness that you just misdiagnosed because you wanted to be cool.

Self Diagnosis =/= Self Assessment

I don’t want to hear “wELL YOU’RE CLASSIST AND ABLEIST CUZ WE CAN’T AFFORD A REAL DIAGNOSIS,,,,” because that’s just a crappy comeback you use when you know you’re wrong.

You can self assess yourself. If you look up symptoms and suspect you might have something, that’s when you get a check up. You can say “I suspect I might have this because……Maybe I should go get it checked out. I’m not entirely sure.”

But it’s completely different when you smash your keyboard on WebMD, find something that has a few symptoms you share, and then go “I AM SELF DX’D WITH THIS BECAUSE ITS SOOOO MEH!!!!”

I understand some of you might have parents/guardians who aren’t willing to accept, or that you have no income. I get it, I do. But that doesn’t give you the right to self diagnose yourself. You’re in no, way, shape or form a professional. Instead, you can self assess yourself and – when you have the opportunity – get some help. It’ll help everyone in the long run.

There’s also many organizations and clinics that have available resources. [x][x][x] Take advantage of that. Don’t use WebMD, for Pete’s sake.

The Mind is a Powerful Tool

Let’s bring some psychology into this. Self diagnosing is not valid because, naturally, the mind is biased. You heard me. It’s biased.

I was previously a hypochondriac. This means that I, too, used WebMD to search up my symptoms whenever I felt like something was wrong. I mistook the flu for something like pneumonia, or aching bones and numb muscles as cancer. These were never the cases, but I always feared that I had some horrible disease that would kill me.

But how did I convince myself that I had these very serious illnesses? When I read the symptoms, my mind was biased and I linked them to what I was showing (or, thought I was) and panicked.

My point is, the mind is a powerful tool. It’s capable of tricking you. If you think you have something, in a lot of cases you’ll start unconsciously acting out the symptoms you read. Your mind will convince you that you have something, when in reality it’s just an illusion. If you say you have something like “Severe Antisocial Disorder”, and are continually happy and sociable with everyone you meet, there’s a high chance that this occurrence happened to you and you were never truly Antisocial – you just thought you were.

Why do you think doctors aren’t allowed to diagnose themselves? Even the best doctors need other doctors to evaluate them and their psych because they could misdiagnose themselves or have biased opinions.

You’re Insecure and Ignorant

Mental illness is a huge trend (and I say trend because where else are you going to see someone list 50+ mental illnesses they copied off of Wikipedia and claim they have them all?) on Tumblr. Almost every blog (typically in between the ages 13-15) I’ve come across, someone’s listed at least 10 of their mental illnesses. Your friends probably scream “ableism” at whoever dares to challenge their labels or “romanticize them” because political correctness is also a thing. Everyone’s trying to score them special snowflake points and seem oppressed. But, in actuality, they’re the ones fetishizing mental illness and making it seem cool and trendy.

Because one person’s doing it, everyone wants to do it. Early teenagers and even late teens and adults are easily influenced and want to fit in. Because mental illness is so cOOL!!! nowadays, something’s wrong with everyone. You might be diagnosing yourself because your friends all have disabilities, or because everyone else has disabilities.

But why. WHY depend on mental illness to get you oppression points and sympathy? Why use those things as labels? There’s a lot of other cool things out there, like favorite bands or cartoons! Hell, even glasses are cool! Why make mental illness a thing? Why further objectify it and milk it until it’s worthless?

Self-dxing yourself is ignorant. You invalidate the people who actually have a mental illness and you’re making it harder for them to get help. Why? Because YOU want to be cool. Because you’re so INSECURE about how boring you are that you have to slap a name on yourself to make yourself seem more unique. Well, you’re not. You’re ignorant. If you’re going to slap a mental illness on yourself, at least do some research on the people who have it and try to understand their situation, rather than just looking at the symptoms and determining you have it. Like, what the actual HELL?

A-A-A-Admin Butt! You’re So Ableist!!! My Feelings Are Hurt! 😥

If you’re offended by everything I’ve said so far, you’re apart of the problem. You’re probably someone who self-dx’d themselves and you’re probably getting upset because I’m talking about people like you. Someone had to say it. You’re not trendy. You’re not cool. You’re sick and disgusting and you should leave and grow up a little bit.

By Tumblr logic, I can’t be ableist. I am professionally, medically diagnosed with Major Depressive Syndrome. I have severe social/normal anxiety and paranoia. I have trichotillomania. I use to have a speech impediment because of how nervous I was. I can’t even function without my antidepressants and my anxiety medicine. Even WITH the medicine, I STILL feel anxious and depressed, but not as bad as I am without it.

I’m so anxious that I don’t go outside. I don’t leave my room. I have – literally – less than 5 friends. Believe it or not, I’m extremely shy as well, which is why I can’t reply to anyone without feeling sick. I can’t hold conversations and it’s really difficult for me to reply to strangers OR my friends. I sit and listen. I don’t know anyone on this website, I just jot my ideas down.

You have NO freakin’ idea what it’s like, being so anxious that you can barely live or breathe. You have NO idea what it’s like not being able to go outside into the real world. You have NO idea what it’s like going to school or the store, and every time you do you have an anxiety attack because you can’t stand being around people and everything suffocates you. You have no idea what it’s like, being constantly angry and bitter because everything makes you anxious and you can’t sit still. You have no idea what it’s like feeling like everyone and everything is out to get you, and you believe your friends are traitors talking behind your back and the world wants you gone. You have no idea what it’s like waking up in the morning, not wanting to move or breathe, not wanting to get up and not being able to feel. I’ve attempted suicide multiple times because I’m sick of living like this, and when I’m not attempting it I’m thinking about how I would off myself and how I’d be better off being gone. I’m sick of not being like a normal person’s suppose to be, not being able to function properly and constantly living in fear. I’m sick of being anxious of the time. I’m sick of taking my freakin’ medicine. I just want to live. I just want to breathe. With friends. With no problems at all. I can’t even make friends, because I can’t talk to people. I can’t.

But then there you are, claiming you have so many illnesses – yet you’re able to live perfectly and free and you don’t have these issues at all. Feeling sad or upset isn’t an anxiety attack, nor is it depression. Feeling angry isn’t being triggered. Having bad memories that isn’t life altering isn’t PTSD. Shut the hell up. If you’re able to type normally while having your so called “anxiety attack”, you’re not having one.

Stop mocking us. You don’t know what it’s like. I’m not ableist. I’m just tired of this freakin’ trend and I’m tired of people pretending they’re sick when they’re not.

Disclaimer, ‘course

This is in no way directed towards people who are medically diagnosed or towards the people who want to help spread awareness. This is also not directed towards anyone who’s self-assessed and seeking medical attention. This is not directed towards anyone in specific. This is directed towards all the little 13-15 year olds (and/or older teens/adults) who are self-diagnosed with 20+ mental illnesses, proudly boast them up on their wall, use them as a crutch to excuse bad behavior and bring it up in every conversation like it’s their whole existence and nothing else matters. In specific: the people who think they’re trendy and cool for being “psycho" and simply use them for labels.

PS. This was way longer than intended…
Oh well. Someone had to get it out there. (:

earthbound-is-best:

tuhmblr-logic:

stopmakingliberalslookbad:

galaxyprincet:

friendly reminder that its ableist to tell a mentally ill person to get help or to take medicine

@galaxyprincet as a self-diagnosed person, you’re not allowed to speak on behalf of mentally ill people. Go away and stop speaking over us.

Suggesting that a mentally ill person seek help is not ableist. Signed, an ACTUALLY mentally ill person.

I hope these people never end up having kids.

“Don’t get help or medicine uwu”

If I didn’t get help or medicine I’d likely be dead by now.

I personally like being a functioning member of society and my medication is what lets me do that, so no, I will continue taking my medication and trying out management techniques to help my brain work as efficiently as it can. I do not like struggling with mental disorders. I doubt anyone who actually has one does enjoy it. My brain can’t do its job on its own so I have to help it out.

Also, one of my good friends finally started treatment for depression in part because I had recommended she do so and I honestly don’t think she would have made it through the semester had she not been on medication. She’s so much better than she was and she’s able to do things she didn’t have the energy to do before.

Telling people they shouldn’t help themselves is ridiculous.

How to help a friend or family member with depression

onlinecounsellingcollege:

Sometimes it is hard to know what to say when speaking to a loved one about depression. You might fear that if you bring up your worries he or she will get angry, feel insulted, or ignore your concerns. You may be unsure what questions to ask or how to be supportive.

If you don’t know where to start, the following suggestions may help. But remember that being a compassionate listener is much more important than giving advice. Encourage the depressed person to talk about his or her feelings, and be willing to listen without judgment. And don’t expect a single conversation to be the end of it. Depressed people tend to withdraw from others and isolate themselves. You may need to express your concern and willingness to listen over and over again. Be gentle, yet persistent.

Ways to start the conversation:

• I have been feeling concerned about you lately.

• Recently, I have noticed some differences in you and wondered how you are doing.

• I wanted to check in with you because you have seemed pretty down lately.

Questions you can ask:

• When did you begin feeling like this?

• Did something happen that made you start feeling this way?

• How can I best support you right now?

• Do you ever feel so bad that you don’t want to be anymore?

• Have you thought about getting help?

Remember, being supportive involves offering encouragement and hope. Very often, this is a matter of talking to the person in language that he or she will understand and respond to while in a depressed mind frame.

What you can say that helps:

• You are not alone in this. I’m here for you.

• You may not believe it now, but the way you’re feeling will change.

• I may not be able to understand exactly how you feel, but I care about you and want to help.

• When you want to give up, tell yourself you will hold of for just one more day, hour, minute — whatever you can manage.

• You are important to me. Your life is important to me.

• Tell me what I can do now to help you.

Avoid saying:

• It’s all in your head.

• We all go through times like this.

• Look on the bright side.

• You have so much to live for why do you want to die?

• I can’t do anything about your situation.

• Just snap out of it.

• What’s wrong with you?

• Shouldn’t you be better by now?

bevsi:

I hate how when someone talks about recovery/helpful coping tips the response is largely “lol this is so neurotypical” like honestly not wanting to stay ill and suffering as long as possible isn’t “neurotypical”. There’s a difference between “u don’t have an illness just do yoga :)” and “you do have an illness, here are some ways to alleviate the symptoms a bit, and improve your mood”

rubyfruitjumble:

Maybe stop calling people neurotypical when you don’t fucking know them because not everyone is comfortable having an itemized list of all their mental disorders in their sidebar hahah